UP IN FLAMES

Shaking her head, she tried telling herself to snap out of it. While that hadn’t helped in the past and most likely wouldn’t now, she hated this perceived weakness inside herself.

A plan of action. That’s what she needed. Except she had no idea what Christopher might have done with the money. If she couldn’t find it, she would be screwed.

She decided to act as if the police or the FBI would catch the caller or find the money or whatever. Once they’d taken care of the threat, she could go on with figuring out a way to regain her life.

When all this was behind her, the first thing she would do would be to sell the house she’d shared with Christopher. The place was too big and pretentious and had never truly felt like home. She’d move somewhere smaller. That way she’d be able to start over in her new life and finally figure out who she was meant to be. If Alaric crept into her thoughts here, she firmly pushed him away. As far as she knew, she and he had no future together.Nôvel/Dr(a)ma.Org - Content owner.

“Are you okay?” Alaric’s deep voice startled her out of her reverie.

Too tired to lie, she shook her head. “No. I’m not.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

Make love to me. The desire sprang up, irrational and strong, blazing like a fire through her sluggish blood. She almost said the words out loud. Almost. Instead, she swallowed them back, stuffing them down into the deepest part of herself, hoping they would stay there.

“Thank you for asking.” She summoned up a polite, impersonal smile that she knew matched the emptiness in her eyes.

Alaric had removed his jacket. He studied her quietly, his broad shoulders filling out his crisp white shirt.

“Come here,” he said, his voice gruff as he held out his arms.

Heaven help her, but she walked right into them as if there’d been an invisible rope between them and he’d given it a tug. As he held her, she felt the warmth begin to flow back into her limbs. She could smell the faint, familiar scent of his cologne, the same mint and musk that he’d always worn. He didn’t speak, didn’t try to ask her questions or attempt to fix whatever her problem might turn out to be. Instead, he simply offered the comfort of his touch.

Blinking back tears, she wondered how his embrace could still mean so much to her, especially since she no longer had the faintest idea who she really was.

———-

When Vanessa stepped back from his embrace, letting her go felt a hundred times more difficult than it should have been. Alaric turned away, hoping he could manage to tamp down his arousal before she noticed. Hell of a thing, wanting to make love to the widow the day of her husband’s funeral. Only the fact that it had never been a real marriage kept him from feeling like a total tool.

“Hey, you two.” Paul sauntered into the kitchen. “How about we go for a walk or some drinks or something? Might help clear some of the melancholy.”

“Great idea,” Alaric replied. “I need a minute to change.”

Vanessa didn’t move. “You two go on without me. I think I’ll stay.”

Though disappointment clouded his face, Alaric shrugged. “Alright. We’ll be back soon,”

Vanessa simply nodded and Alaric hurried upstairs to change. He didn’t dare look at her. He knew if he did, he’d feel compelled to try to talk her into going. He knew as well as she did how much a walk could improve one’s mood. After he changed and headed out to the garage, Vanessa was nowhere in sight. He and Paul drove instead of taking a walk. They had a few drinks and although Alaric had a few laughs with Paul, he didn’t feel comfortable without his eyes on Vanessa.

Finally, Paul dropped his glass. “What do you think? Should we head back now?”

“Yeah, I think we should go on back to the house,” Alaric said. “If you want to continue to enjoy the day out here, I’ll leave you to it.”

Paul frowned. He checked his watch. “It is getting late. You’re probably right, and you shouldn’t leave Vanessa alone for so long, especially on the day of Christopher’s burial.”

They got into the car and headed back the way they’d come. It seemed to take forever to get back to the house. When they finally made it through the gate and pulled up in her driveway, Alaric fought the urge to hop off and run for the house to make sure she was okay.

Instead, he made himself go slowly. Once inside, he headed to Vanessa’s room. Her door was closed, so he tapped lightly on it. “Vanessa? Are you okay?”

When she didn’t immediately answer, he tried again.

“I’m fine,” she finally said, her voice shaky. “I need some space. I’ll be down soon.”

Alaric backed away. More than anything, he wanted to bust through that door and gather her in his arms.

Since she clearly didn’t need that, he’d do as she requested and leave her alone. Back downstairs, he walked outside where Paul stood. Now that he knew that Vanessa was safe, he wasn’t sure what to do with himself.

“Is she okay?” Paul asked him,

Alaric managed a nonchalant shrug. “I think so. She’s holed up in her room. Says she wants to be left alone.”

“That makes sense.” Paul sighed. “Has Vanessa had any luck finding the missing money?”

“No.”

“Well, that sucks,”

“Tell me about it,”

Paul was silent for a while then he said, “Have you told her?”

Alaric stared blankly at him, “About what?” he asked

“About how you feel about her,”

Alaric shook his head, “No, I haven’t. How can I? I don’t deserve her. She deserves someone better…. NotNot someone like me. Besides, with all the drama going on the funeral, I’m sure the last thing she wants to hear about are my feelings,”

Paul stared at him like he was crazy, “So, you really going to let her go? Look Alaric, I’ve never seen you act this way about any woman since I’ve known you, and you’re really going to let her go? You know, for a smart guy, you are making a very stupid decision, but hey, it’s none of my business,”

Paul walked toward the door that led into the house. “Let’s go find Vanessa and see how she’s doing.” He said.