Trouble : Chapter 18
You just have to lean into it.
It don’t have to mean nothing.
You’re a fighting machine.
Oh my god. Could this get any worse? Lean. Mean. A fighting machine. Those are the best lyrics I can come up with?
It’s about time I told Ford that I’m not going to make any of my deadlines this year or next. Hell, I should probably tell him to scrap the album. My music is gone.
I storm toward the door, desperate for fresh air.
In the past, when I’ve had difficulty with a song, I’ve taken to running. Sure, it’s winter in New England—in other words, frigid—but something has got to give.
My emotions this week have been all over the place. Even so, I’m comfortable in Declan’s house. Content in this town. I take a left out the door and follow the path toward the water. The same path Cade and I used to get here that first night.
It’s odd thinking about it now. How comfortable I was with Cade. How naïve too. I thought he would be nothing more than a fling. Maybe that will still turn out to be true, but it doesn’t feel that way. Cade is like a glorious sunrise, warming me from the outside in.
And then there’s Declan.
I let out a sigh.
If Cade is the sun, Declan is like a sky full of stars. Hard to capture, sometimes hidden, but god, when they’re visible on a clear night, they bring light to even the darkest of canvases. He’s everywhere in this town. Everywhere I look.
Sky full of stars.
Midnight moments.
You and me…we’ll never—
An animal bursts from the woods and onto the running path, charging right for me.
“Oh shit!” I shriek.
My heart pounds so wildly as the damn deer darts into the woods on the other side of the path and disappears into the bare trees. “Come on, Bambi. I had a song forming,” I whine. I pull my phone out of the side pocket of my leggings, hoping I can remember the lyrics and type them out. But I come up blank. Was it about the constellations? Or the stars? Shootings stars? Hmm, I could work with that.
Frustrated, I stare up at the gray sky. There is no sun today. Fitting, since Cade isn’t here.
With that thought, I dial the man who warms me even in frigid weather.
“Hey, Trouble,” he says, picking up after just one ring.
I bite my lip, tempering my smile. Just his voice makes me giddy. “I was almost roadkill.”Content protected by Nôv/el(D)rama.Org.
“What?” He makes a choking sound. “Are you okay? Did someone almost hit you? Is Dec there?” The sheer panic in his tone has me feeling a bit guilty, even as I practically float down the path toward the water, unable to wipe the smile off my face.
“I’m fine, babe. It was a deer.”
“Babe?”
I hum, trying to play off what I just called him.
“Nuh-uh,” he says. “You aren’t getting off easy on that one, Trouble.”
“Fitz.”
“Fine. Are you okay, or did Bambi take you out?” He chuckles as he says it, but I don’t even care.
I don’t want to get into a conversation about calling him babe. Not that I think he’s averse to it. Because it definitely sounded like he liked it.
“I’m fine. He just scared me, is all. Now I’m heading toward the fire station.”
“Oh yeah? Why’s that?”
I roll my eyes, still irritated by the grumpy man who’s doing his best to avoid talk of this weekend. “Because Declan is ignoring my texts. Claims he has to work all weekend, but I’m not buying it.”
“I’m sorry about that. Dec is—” Cade huffs a breath, like he’s not sure how to explain his best friend’s behavior. I don’t need him to explain Declan to me, though. I understand why he’s hiding from me. Hell, I should probably let him. We’ve grown incredibly close this week, sharing the same bed, spending far too many hours just sharing one another’s company.
But I’m sleeping with his best friend. And I really like Cade.
God, none of it makes sense.
“Dec feels like the third wheel,” he finally says.
“Who’s to say that’s a bad thing? Semis need more than two wheels,” I counter.
Cade chuckles. “Never said it was. Truckers are hot.”
We both laugh, though it dies out quickly. The three of us would be hot. Cade knows it, I know it, and I think if Declan were honest with himself, with us, he’d agree.
“I’ll talk to him,” Cade murmurs. That simple sentence alone, the knowledge of what he wants to say, has chills running across my skin.
“No need. I’m going to convince him to join us for dinner.”
Cade’s laughter is low. “Okay, trouble. Can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”
“You too, babe.”
His laughter rings out as I tap the End button, a grin splitting my face.
When the phone rings only seconds later, I assume it’s him again and answer quickly. “Miss me already?”
The smile is wiped clear off my face when I hear the voice on the other end of the line.