The Glimpse of My Past

Liam’s P. O. V.

Damn you, Leandro! 

How did he know about what happened four years ago? Did he and Steve accidentally meet in the States? Shit!

Narrowing my eyes due to frozen anger, I should have never let Leandro come into the picture again. He could do whatever he could, but that would never scare me. I would never let him manipulate my feelings for Diane. I wouldn’t let him control my life, and I would never give in to his fucking demands no matter what.

Damn it! I was breathing heavily because I was preventing myself from getting even with him. I would never stoop down his level. All my life, I was taught to be sanguine and was raised to hold my rage. Fighting with him last year was already enough. Our parents would not be happy if they would see us attacking each other, especially Mom.

Yes, Leandro was right. Diane deserved to know the whole truth. I wouldn’t keep it away from her in our entire lives but now was definitely not the right time.

But when is the right time? When Diane had already fallen deeply in love with you? Until it comes to a certain point that she can no longer handle the situation once she learns the truth? Did you think that she will not break down, and she will continue to embrace you after she finds out that you lied to her? asked my conscience.

Shit! I balled my fists and wanted to punch the wall, but I restrained myself. Leandro would just be happy seeing me this broken and dejected.

But what should I do? Why couldn’t I think straight when it comes to her? Diane is my life now, and I couldn’t bear to live without her.

God knew how much I loved her. I really do. But I knew that once she learned about that damned fucking truth, she would leave me without even thinking twice. I already considered that possibility from the moment I saw her again, but now? I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t let her know. I couldn’t let her go. And I didn’t know when I would be ready to tell her because I couldn’t afford to lose her!

My heart was aching. I planned to tell Diane the whole truth from the very start, but I got scared. Nothing on her face showed any trace of what happened yesterday, so who am I to remind her of it? I would only hurt her for the sin I committed against her on that one terrifying evening.

I never thought that I would fall for her like this-to the point that when it comes to her, I didn’t seem to know myself anymore. If I became a coward to face her before, I was still a coward now because I wouldn’t want to lose her.

Every time we were together, I wanted to possessively own her. But I knew for a fact that she would never be mine, and I didn’t have any rights at all because of what I did to her. It was all my fault, and now, I didn’t know when I would stop blaming myself for raping her.

Exiting from Leandro’s office that was only the opposite of my office here, I narrowed my eyes as I immediately instructed Trixie.

“Cancel all my meetings and appointments for the whole day. Tell Eric to prepare my private jet right away!” I was no longer in the mood and what I wanted right now was to be with my girlfriend, because we rarely saw each other here.

“Sure thing, sir!” Trixie quickly replied before typing on her office computer. 

I was about to go to the elevator when I glanced back at her-she was now about to reach her office phone.

“And Trixie, don’t you dare follow any of Leandro’s instructions ever again. Because the next time you will do that, you will be fired! Understand?” I told her grimly.

Never did I raise my voice to my secretary because she was always doing an outstanding job. Just now. She failed, and I wasn’t the type of boss to treat that mistake lightly, especially what she did concerned Diane.

“Y-Yes, sir. I-I’m sorry, it won’t ever happen again.” Trixie bowed her head while apologizing. I didn’t mind her anymore and marched away from her.

Trixie’s job was so important to her, and like Diane, she was also a breadwinner. For sure, she had no other choice but to obey Leandro because he scared her. Trixie didn’t mean to do this. My brother might be clever enough to play his games well, but I wouldn’t let him steal what was never his. I had to play my cards better than him. I had to plan ten steps ahead of him.

I headed straight towards the elevator, and when I got inside, my forefinger immediately pressed the fifth floor and closed buttons. Heaving a deep sigh, I detached my tie because the situation seemed to be choking me. I could no longer wait to see my beloved girlfriend.

Then, I removed the first three buttons of my white long-sleeved polo underneath my favorite American coat. While looking at the mirror glass inside the elevator, I couldn’t help but fix my hair that wasn’t even ruined at all. I was on my way to see my Diane, so I should be as stunning as ever.

My steps were in a rush when I went in front of their office. Having second thoughts about whether I would enter inside or not, I stopped when something caught my attention. I was outside the sliding door of the Finance Department, but I could already hear the screaming women from the inside.

The women’s conversation was so loud that everything could be heard outside their office. Their room was facing the corridor where people were passing, and some women inside were too loud not to be noticed.

“Hey! Admit it, girl… is he your boyfriend? Is he the one who goes by his codename-Mr. Handsome? The one who was giving you flowers and chocolates here?”

“In fairness, the two of you looked great together? He’s handsome, and here you are… damn gorgeous!”

“Yeah, right! I couldn’t agree more. He looked like a Greek god, but a snobbish one! How could he ignore my beauty? Duh!”Exclusive content © by Nô(v)el/Dr/ama.Org.

“It’s because you’re not as beautiful as Diane! Hello?”

“I saw the two of you in Moonbucks, and don’t you ever lie to us, Diane. He even placed his arm all over your shoulder. I envied you, oh my God!”

“Indeed! When I was about to go to the second floor, I even saw him hugging her. I just left because they looked so perfect together. But before that, I was able to capture their sweet moments together. Take a look, girls… they seemed to be in a movie shoot!”

“Don’t let him go, sister! Oh my God, grab the opportunity and date him now.”

My forehead immediately wrinkled at what I heard, and that made me crumple my fists too. I was trying to think straight, but it looked like my mind already floated in the air, leaving me with irrational thoughts.

Wait! Are they talking about Diane being hugged by another man? After Leandro, should I deal with this one too? And who’s this fucking man who dared to touch my woman? My facial expression turned dark.

With hunched posture, I paced towards the sliding glass door and my shaky fingers hurriedly pressed the code outside their office. I couldn’t brush off the frowns all over my forehead as I entered their office. As a result, all the women who seemed to be talking out loud earlier immediately quieted and returned to their original cubicles.

Diane was located in the nearest cube, so I didn’t have to exert much effort going to her. But that was one thing I hated about having Diane sit closest to the door. Men who were going here would instantly notice her.

I heard that some new hires, with their ATM cards still to be processed, were already coming back and forth to the Finance Department to get their paychecks. They were just doing it intentionally, maybe to see my gorgeous girlfriend, because there wasn’t even an announcement that those were ready to be handpicked, and we were still too far from the payday.

“Diane, in my office… right now! Bring those January to March financial reports with you.” I retained my glowering look.

My voice got louder than the usual before silence filled their entire office. I didn’t know why I suddenly got insecure and grumpy. Diane was left with no other choice but to stand up and get the folder from her in-tray and quickly followed me. She was almost running.