Chapter 67 by Cara Anderson
Ch. 67 Sage Advice
Colton’s POV
I let Kai run for hours that night after turning my back on Darcy and letting Alpha Quade walk away with her. Every instinct screamed at me to find Mallory, explain the truth behind my actions and beg her forgiveness. But I’d needed time to think before facing her, so I gave my wolf free reign while I considered my next move.
In the end, I’d decided maybe time was my best ally. I’d come running to her with assurances that I was over Darcy twice before and as far as she knew, I’d lied both times. After betraying our bond, the only way she might believe me was if some time passed without me hurting her again,
Kai in no way approved of that plan, harassing me daily to go see our mate.
And every time, I would talk him down, explaining that we needed to put her needs first and what she needed was space. But like every other day, he wasn’t having it.
“Raven needs me!” He insisted, demanding to see Mallory’s wolf.
“Just a little more time, Kai!” I countered.
“No!” He roared, startling me.
We didn’t always agree but we always talked it out. But his impatience and fury at being denied rattled me. I felt him pulling away from me and I couldn’t let that happen. He was all I had left. That was how I’d ended up at the packhouse, knocking on my brothers’ door and begging to see my mate.
I shouldn’t have been surprised to find them there and running interference for her. I’d expected to have a fight on my hands if I ran into either of them. What I wasn’t prepared for was the look of utter desolation on my little Omega’s face when she saw me.
Clay railed at me with all the venom of a pit viper but his words barely registered. Even after Mallory left, I couldn’t stop seeing her face. Her skin was pale, her eyes red-rimmed and sunken. She was still breathtakingly beautiful but it was clear she’d been struggling. And it was my fault. I did that to her.
When he slammed the door in my face, I slid down the wall, hitting the floor with a thud and hanging my head in my hands. I tugged at the short strands of my sandy blond hair, self-disgust seeping through every poor. I’d only wanted to keep her safe, but I’d made the worst mistake of my life.
“Colton? Son, what are you doing in the hall?” My mother asked, confused at finding me sitting there.
“Mom, I fucked up.” My voice broke, and tears slid down my face.
“Oh, baby boy. Come on. I’ll make you some hot cocoa and we can talk like we used to.” she offered.
I nodded and pushed off the floor, letting her lead me to the smaller apartment they’d moved into while I was gone. I sat at their kitchen table, watching her flit around making our drinks like she’d done so many times when I was a pup. I wished I could go back to those days when life was simpler. I wished life gave second chances so I could make different choices, ones that would never cause my mate to suffer.
“What’s going on, Colton?” Mom asked pointedly, setting two mugs on the table and sitting across from me.” Tell me everything.”
I watched her features change from anger to sadness to disappointment then back to anger again as I told her the whole sordid tale. I could practically feel her biting her own tongue against the need to lecture me for every stupid mistake I revealed, one after another. But it felt good to get it all out and although she’d never hesitate to tell me exactly what she thought of my idiocy, I knew she loved me unconditionally.
“Colton, what am I going to do with you?” She shook her head, clearly aggravated with me.
“I know. I’m a shitty excuse for an Alpha: You don’t have to tell me that.
Just tell me how to fix it.” I snipped, then instantly regretted my tone. ”
Please. I can’t stand seeing that devastated look in her eyes, mom. I have to find a way to make this better.”
“I wish I had some sage advice for you, son. But the truth is, I don’t think there are any easy solutions to this situation. I think the best you can do is be the man she deserves, whether she chooses to forgive you or not. At least that way, you’ll know you’re worthy of her if she does take you back.
“Now your brothers are a whole other story! I understand being angry, furious even. She’s their mate too and you hurt her. But there is no excuse for shutting you out of their sibling bond! You don’t turn your back on family! Your father and I always taught you that.”
“Let it go, mom. I should have told them what I was doing. I didn’t because I knew they wouldn’t let me go through with it. Once again, I made a choice without consulting them and it drove a wedge between us.” I admitted. “This is my fault and I’ll work it out with them on my own.”
“I’m proud of you, son. Not all Alphas can admit when they’ve made a mistake. I know you’ll find a way to make things right.” She said with a confidence I hadn’t earned.
“I hope you’re right.” I answered, sighing sadly.
Mom and I finished our drinks and she walked me to the door. I surprised her by scooping her up into a bear hug, her feet dangling off the floor.
“I love you, mommy.” I told her, just like I used to as a kid.Owned by NôvelDrama.Org.
“I love you too, my baby boy.” She replied, giggling as I set her back on her feet and kissed her goodbye.
I spent the rest of the day hanging around the packhouse. I really had nowhere else to go and felt an unassailable need to be near Mallory even if I couldn’t be with her. If I had tried to leave, I was pretty sure I would have had to fight Kai to do it.
So I shot a couple games of pool with a few of the off duty warriors hanging around the lounge. When dinner time rolled around, I headed to the dining hall with the rest of the pack members. I might not be welcome in the home my brothers shared with our mate, but they didn’t have the authority to kick me out of the packhouse altogether. Yet.
In the end, it was a moot point. The three of them never came down to dinner. I nibbled at my food, pushing it around on my plate more than actually eating it, dragging out the meal as long as possible. Finally, I gave up and headed upstairs to my office.
It had been weeks since I’d been there, preferring to sleep in the woods in my wolf form rather than risk a run in with my mate or siblings. But now that the band-aid had been painfully ripped off, I had no further excuses to avoid my job. And as expected, my desk was piled with files needing my review.
With a groan I sank into my chair and started flipping through one document after another, signing some and shredding others. It was well past midnight by the time I looked at the clock again and I felt a sense of accomplishment for the first time in weeks. But for all the attempts at distraction, the need to see Mallory was nagging at me.
Our mate bond had felt dull and lifeless in the intervening weeks but after seeing her earlier, it was singing again. Or maybe that was just the indelible love my wolf and I felt for her, bond or no. Either way, I wondered if she felt it too, if she felt the pull to me as I did to her. Suddenly, my feet were carrying me back to the Alpha apartment despite my conscious brain telling me it was a bad idea.
All I wanted was to see her face, breathe in her scent that I’d so desperately missed. With that mission in mind, I stood outside the door for a few minutes, listening for any indication Clay and Cary were still awake to intercept me. Hearing none, I twisted the knob, wincing when the locking mechanism groaned under my strength then rattled when it broke.
On silent footsteps, I slipped inside and closed the door behind me. Just like earlier, their scents bowled me over, making me weak in the knees.
“Home!” My wolf purred.
Technically he was right. It was the Alpha residence and I was an Alpha. Nevermind I wasn’t welcome here as far as the other occupants were concerned. It couldn’t really be considered breaking and entering, could it?
The house was dark and only the low hum of the refrigerator could be heard as I crept down the hall. Finding the master bedroom door wide open, I peered inside. My breath caught in my throat.
The smell of sex hit me like an oncoming train. The three of them were tangled together, Mallory between my brothers, completely naked. Mallory’s skin still glowed with
the most beautiful flush from their activities. Jealousy stung me, my skin prickling with it, as I drank her in, noticing how perfectly all her soft curves melded with them.
My cock was instantly hard, forcing me to readjust it in my pants with a low groan. I knew I was behaving like a perverted stalker and I needed to go, but my feet wouldn’t move. Before I could make my escape, Mallory stirred and her eyes popped open, locking with mine.
I took a step forward, my arm reaching for her of its own accord, but I stopped myself. She didn’t want me. As if I needed proof, she turned away from me, burying her face in Cary’s chest. It was the motivation I needed to kick my ass in gear and get the hell out of dodge.
My heart cracked, another piece falling away at her rejection. I’d thought that organ had long turned to dust and swept away in the wind but today had taught me I still had enough left to break. I was panting, sucking in sharp breaths as pain wracked my body, until I finally reached my room.
“Fuck!” I growled loudly, punching the wall and pulling away a bloody fist.
Their relationship had progressed so far and they’d done it without me. I was supposed to be there with them, in that bed with them, by her side, holding her close while she slept safely in my arms. I was missing so much time with her. But there was no one to blame but myself.
No matter how long it took, I swore to myself and my wolf that I would win her back. In the meantime, I would watch from the shadows. I would always be there, keeping her safe, helping her fight her battles and vanquish her enemies, and she would never know I was there. Not until she wanted me to be. It was the least I could do.