His Soul & His Shame

"Purple Pizzeria" is the place we always come to because it feels like home and they sell the best pizza you can ask for. The theme of the pizzeria is purple and the employee's uniform is also purple. Purple is the last color in the Rainbow and but it looks so good and some say the color has a special meaning.

I waited in my seat for Ezra to open my door, I am not particular about that but Ezra always insists that I wait for him to open my door, and now I don't want to piss him off more.

We all came out of the car and entered the pizzeria at once. I stood at the entrance looking for seats, trying to get us the best seats to enjoy our pizzas.

"Come, let's go, I have found the place," Ezra said, taking my hand and guiding me to the backside of the place.

I am feeling so much awkward because of Ezra's actions. Why did he hold my hand and not Mitch's? It's hard for me to be in this awkward situation.

"I can walk and I have seen the place, please leave my hand." I removed my hand from his and kept some distance between us. I can see Ezra's jaw hardening at this. It doesn't matter to me now. "Faye!" He threatened but I am not in the mood to listen.

"Come, Joe! We will sit beside each other before Ezra forces us to not." I whispered in Joanna's ear and we both giggled at that.

I and Joanna hurriedly walked to the seats and took our places beside each other and left two chairs for Ezra and Mitch.

"What do you think you are doing Fay?" Ezra asked, cocking his eyebrow.

"umm, nothing, I just took a seat. What do you think I am doing?" I counter-attacked him and took the menu to check the pizzas.

" seriously! Fay? I...." He is cut off by Mitch's Voice.

"

'I think it's enough for Today babe, please sit." Mitch glared at him while saying this.

He grumbled something before he took his place and sat in front of me.

It's been 10 mins since we ordered and waiting for it but I can feel Ezra's glares and it's bothering me. I am feeling annoyed and turned on at the same time.

I am clenching my thighs under the table because Ezra is looking angry and hot made me all worked up sexually.

"Umm, I am going to the restroom." I excused myself before getting up from my seat and went to the restroom. I have to get the hell out of there if not there will be a poodle under the table.

When I excused myself I saw Ezra's eyes and in them, there was a knowing look that made me confused. What the heck did he know? I ignored that and went to the restroom.

I calmed myself by splashing water on my face and took deep breaths to slow my heart and nerves. This is not good, so not good. I have to do something before I ruin our friendship and everything.

Ughh why am I being like this, why did I have to feel something for my best friend and get hurt every time I see him with her or have to control my desires for him. It's better to focus on one thing than everything at once. Finally, I can calm my nerves and myself. I dried my hands and fixed myself before exiting the restroom.

"What the hell Ezra! You scared the hell out of me." I yelled, punching his arm trying to calm my racing heart. When I exited the restroom he was waiting for me outside the door leaning on the wall and it scared me. I thought some sick pervert was waiting there.

"Hahaha baby girl, I am so sorry I scared you." He mocked, rolling his eyes.

"It's not funny, hard head, you scared me for real. I thought you were some pervert waiting for girls in front of the restrooms." I laughed at his disgusted expression.

"Aha! Is that so? Let me show you how perverted I can be." He took his steps towards me slowly with a smirk. shit, why am I excited being in this situation! What is wrong with me? He's my bestfriend and he has mitch. This is wrong, so wrong. "What happened baby girl? Why are you fidgeting! Is something wrong?" Ezra took some more steps towards me and asked with a smile in his voice. he is enjoying this completely.

"Stop Ezra, what do you think you are doing? I think we should head back." I stuttered trying to escape this situation.

" 'I don't think so and I want to talk to you and I can't do that before your annoying friend." he scowled, talking about Joanna. she thinks the same about him I said inside my head.

"Not again Ezra! there is nothing to talk about, so let's go before Mitch finds us here."I said and turned to return but stopped by Ezra's words.

"So? let her find us, No one is more important than this, and stop running, talk to me," Ezra grumbled, caging me between his arms. I'm surrounded by his chocolate fragrance which makes me crave it. please Ezra don't do this to me, don't come this close to me. I can't control myself anymore. my head is spinning with thoughts and his smell and warmth.

"Please talk to me, baby girl. What happened to you? Why are you ignoring me? Did I do something wrong! If so, please punish me by slapping me or by buying whatever you want with my card but please dont ignore me." I can hear desperation, longing, and sadness in his voice but I can't let him do this to me again.

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"you did nothing Ezra, I.... I just want some space between...between u...us. I mean we should take a break being friends." words ran out from my mouth and my eyes are closed because I can't bear to see his reaction. "What did you just say? Come again, Fay! I think I heard something so absurd."

"You heard everything right Ezra, I want a break. it's so overwhelming." These words were so hard for me to utter to him. but I have to do this now for him, for me, for our friendship. he will never see me more than a friend and I can't be just friends with him.

"What is so overwhelming Fay? me or our friendship? just tell me so I can know too." Ezra is so close to me now, in the same position as before in the parking lot but this feels different from before.

"I just want a break, Ezra, please!" my words are mere whispers now. our noses are touching and just with that my body is on fire and the whole damn zoo is in my stomach dancing.

"I can't baby girl, Ezra is nothing without Fay. please don't do this." he pleaded but I have made up my mind and I'm not going to budge.

"Sorry Ezra, this is for me. I have to do this. you may not understand now but you will understand this eventually." I whispered, closing my eyes inhaling his breath and he leaned some more into me making me hard to do what I am going to

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"I'm sorry Ezra." maybe one last time I can feel his lips on mine. I always wanted to taste him and feel his lips on mine but it didn't come to this. We both leaned at the same time. I can smell his chocolate breath which I like and now I can taste it too.

"E...Ezra! F...Fay?" we heard her stuttering voice, Ezra moved aside like I'm burning him. This hurts so much. He said not minutes ago that nothing is more important than this. then why did he move because of her?

"She will always come first and she is more important than anything. I regretted the decision I took but now it is clear that whatever I am going to do is best for me.

I held my head high and didn't make my tears fall and get wasted, so I excused myself from there. I am not interested in their drama. I have my life and my problems to think about.

I will always be his shame, nothing more.