Filthy Beautiful Forever(Filthy Beautiful Lies, #4)

Mia I can hardly believe three whole months have passed since I surprised Collins by showing up on his doorstep with almost everything I owned. It’s even harder to believe how things have turned out since then.

Collins and I share the master bedroom. We have for a few months. It still feels a bit odd to have so much space just for a room to sleep in, but when I pointed this out to Collins, he got a smug grin on his face and grumbled that he planned on doing a whole lot more than just sleeping with me in this room. He’d definitely delivered on that promise.

Saturdays Collins and I usually spend the day together, however, today he has some loose ends he has to tie up at work, so we won’t be meeting up until later.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

I lay in bed, still in a lazy Saturday morning haze, when Collins emerges from the bathroom, clean-shaven, wearing jeans and a T-shirt. He sits down next to me on the bed and leans over, brushing a stray hair back from my face.

“I can get up and eat breakfast with you,” I say and start to sit up, but he pushes me back.

“Don’t. Stay in bed. I’m running late anyways. I’ll eat on the way. Sorry I have to go in,” he says, kissing me gently on the lips.

“It’s okay,” I smile, hoping to wash his worry away. “You’ve been working hard on this business deal, and I know it means a lot to you. Besides, we still have tonight.”

“Mia, you’re too good for me.”

I shake my head. “Just good enough.”

That gets a smile from him.

“I’ll see you later.” He steals one more kiss before rushing out the door.

As I watch Collins go, it hits me how lucky I am to have him. Despite being close to him my whole childhood, our relationship now is on an entirely different level. We connect better emotionally and physically than I ever dreamed. I love him deeply, and though we haven’t flat out spoken those words yet, I know we both feel it. I feel it when he holds me close and whispers promises to take care of me. He feels it when he’s in the mood to discuss his mother, and I listen patiently and hold his hand. We are there for each other in all the ways that matter.

I hug his pillow to my chest, and breathe in his musky scent that still lingers. He is my rock, my savior, and at times, my comic relief. He’s always seen something in me that no one else has. Starting the first day we met. Me, in last year’s pants that were two inches too short and a second-hand T-shirt. But Collins didn’t see any of that. He saw the girl beneath. My mother said I had a heart of gold, and while my father always warned that it doesn’t get you very far in life, Collins saw inside me and he loved all of me, which made me feel whole. I could just be me and not worry that all my classmates had designer clothes, and yet my family scraped by to make ends meet. It never occurred to me that I might not measure up, because to him, I always have.

I stretch one more time and pull myself out of bed. I’ve got to get ready too. Kylie asked me to go with her and Sophie to get mani-pedis. Although Sophie’s pregnancy has been going fine for the most part, apparently her emotions have been a little out of control. Mostly to the effect of her bursting into tears every so often. She swears she’s fine, and it’s just the hormones, but Kylie thought it would be nice for the three of us to go out and have a girls’ day at the salon. Just to lighten up her mood.

Collins has been trying to get me to pamper myself for months now, offering to buy me a spa day. He went on about how I went through some rough times with losing my job. But I’m not comfortable having him spend all that money on me, even if he can afford it.

After showering I head to my enormous new closet. The first time Collins showed it to me I couldn’t believe it. There’s a chandelier! The thing is larger than my old bedroom was in Connecticut, and entirely too big for the small suitcase worth of clothing I brought here.

Even after I received my settlement money from my last job and bought some new clothes for my job at the law firm, I still only use a small set of drawers in one corner, and a small section for hanging my dresses.

I pull on a tank top and some cutoffs, slip into my flip-flops, grab my keys and purse and head out to meet the girls.

When I arrive at the salon, they are already there.

“Here she is,” Sophie says, her voice is high and excited, and she smiles big. I’ve only been in LA a few months, but I love how close I’ve become with Sophie and Kylie already.

I give them both hugs in greeting, and the spa staff set us up in three neighboring pedicure chairs. I try to get Sophie to sit in the middle seat, but she wants to sit near the window, so I end up between the two.

I sink my feet into the hot water, and sigh. It’s been a while since I’ve done something so decadent. I’m used to worrying about rent, or the next student-loan payment. I still have student-loans, but with the salary at my new job, the fact that I no longer pay rent, and the settlement money which I’m mostly saving, I finally have room to breathe financially.

“This is the best,” Sophie says as she sinks back into her chair.

“How’s the little one treating you?” I ask eagerly, motioning to her stomach. She isn’t showing yet, but there is a glow about her that hints at her pregnancy. I can’t help but get excited for her. Just talking about it brings an energized grin to my face.

“Oh just fine,” she rolls her eyes as if it’s no big deal. “I feel almost guilty because I haven’t had morning sickness or anything.”

“I bet you can’t wait to meet him or her,” I say.

“I am super excited,” she says. A small tear wells in her eyes. A reminder that her hormones are acting up. “Maybe one day, you and Collins can have a baby too. And if you have one soon, they could play together.” She sniffles, and another tear drifts down her cheek, but then she laughs at herself, making Kylie and I laugh with her.

Yet I realize how envious I am of her. I can’t help but wonder and hope that one day Collins and I will have a family of our own. The idea of it is enough to give me a rush of joy. I know Collins would be a great father. My heart warms at the image of him chasing around our little son or daughter, resurrecting the tickle monster just for them.

Of course we still haven’t talked about our future, I don’t want to rush him. For now I’m happy just being with him. And I know he’s happy too.

My phone chirps and I check it to find a message from Collins.

I miss you, Gremlin.