Chapter 44
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I shouldn’t be surprised as I open my eyes and realise where I am.
Cian has taken me to his personal home in the immortal realm, which is impossible to escape from. The moment he lets go of me, the world coming back in all its shapes and colours, I jump away from him, not stopping my backward steps until I nearly stumble back of his white leather chaise lounge. My thoughts are scattered, the realisation of what he has done hitting me.
He’s taken me from the mortal realm, to where he lives, likely to control whether I can leave or not. My heart sinks to its lowest point, knowing it’s unlikely I’m going to be getting out of this very easily, considering his state of mine.
However, I never would have guessed he would go to this extreme… I trusted him.
“You can’t do this,” I tell him uneasily, wishing my voice wasn’t so shaky. You don’t want to do this.
Cian paces back and forth, the large window behind him showing a world cast in darkness, the moonlight dancing in leaving his figure drenched in shadow. I was anxiously as he rakes his hands through his hair incessantly, the golden roots glowing and glimmering menacingly, a visual show of the power he could use, but doesn’t.
“I just need time to think.” He mutters, looking over me before wincing, turning back to his pacing. I could approach him, maybe try calm him down, but I’m afraid that in this moment he’s going to overreact and do something he will regret.
“You didn’t need to take me here. Why don’t we head back?” I offer smoothly, hoping that gently coaxing him to return me will be the best way about it.
He doesn’t look convinced though, eyes wild and unhinged.
“If I take you back, I’m never going to see you again,” he says hoarsely. I realise in that moment that Cian isn’t going to hurt me, or do anything unspeakable. He’s broken, finding out he is losing an integral part of him because of another male. I can’t expect him to take it very well.
Taking a few tentative steps forward, I reach my hands out to him “Don’t say that, of course you will.”
He lets me grabs ahold of his hands, which feel cold and limp within mine. He looks as though he is on the verge of tears, but refuses to show it in front of me. If I have to watch a powerful immortal break down, all because of me, I’m not sure what I would do.
“I guess I’m just not good enough.”
“Let’s not be unreasonable,” I tell him firmly, shaking his hands to get his attention, however he won’t even look at me. He’s not thinking or acting like how he usually does, so how can I expect him to be reasonable? I’m just not sure what else to do, or to say. ” Let’s go back to where we were to talk, I would feel a lot more comfortable.”
Finally he looks at me, eyes dark and stirring with frightening, feral emotion. Would this have been how he would act if we had any disagreement in our relationship? I didn’t choose Cian to ultimately be the one I wanted as my mate for the rest of my life for a variety of reasons, but should this have been one of them? I knew he was high strung, but this is far more damaging than I would have first thought.
“I could just keep you here. Until I collect my thoughts,” he reasons, as if what he is saying is at all rational. I don’t let the fact that my stomach is plummeting and twisting uneasily to reach my expression, which I fight to keep impassive.
“Why are you doing this? I don’t want our relationship to be destroyed,” I half beg. I was hoping Cian and I could keep being friendly after all of this.
Now I’m not so sure.
“Our relationship was destroyed the moment Noah came into your life. He should have just kept his side of the deal and stayed away,” He mutters, making me take a step backward with a frown etched into my face.
“But you didn’t keep your side,” I remind him.
Their collective deal to stay away from me is still something I resent about both of them, but to some degree understand why they did it. Cian was the one to break it, to pursue me despite the rule being to never come near me, or to speak to me. And especially to not insinuate that there was any mate bond. Noah only started pursuing me when the deal was off.
“But I’m not a good person. He is meant to be the good one, he should have stepped away,” Cian rants, at this point hardly making sense. I want to shake some into him, make him realise what he’s doing, and what he’s risking by being like this. “But the world is always against me. That’s why I was made to be a Sin.”
“We don’t need to take this out on anyone Cian,” I remind him. “I do feel guilty, but I’m not going to apologise about making my decision.”
He walks away from me, carrying his rich, spicy scent with him. Admittedly my body still reacts to it, to him, even in moments like these. Hopefully that will die down once the bond with Noah is confirmed.
“What am I meant to do with my life now?” At this point his hair is mussed and untamed from the endless sweep of his hand through it.
“Find your other mate. Because I have no doubt she is out there,” I say softly. He pauses, looking at me solemnly. If I had to face that idea of finding another mate out there right now, I think I might go crazy. As an immortal who has waited many years for this opportunity, I can’t begin to imagine how he is feeling when faced with that prospect.
“But I want you,” he exasperates. “I need you.”
I’m lost for words. I simply know one thing. “I just want to go home.”
“I need time to think,” Is all he says, before he begins to stalk toward the front door. Frightened at what I predict he is going to do next, I follow him. “Stay here, please. I’ll be back in a moment.”
Despite my protests, he leaves, closing the door behind him and locking it with some kind of magic, as I try the door handle multiple times and it doesn’t budge. Frustrated I whirl around, pacing around his small apartment, looking for any way out. Even if I did escape, though, I would have no way of getting back to the mortal realm, and I can’t imagine immortals here would be so willing to return me.
Here I’m weak, powerless against the people that dwell in these lands.
Except on not.
Sitting down on the lounge set, I think for a moment. Stace said he believes I have powers, which although is rare, even in the place that I come from is totally possible. If only I could lure Cian, back here, make him see me again for who I am. Maybe then he would take me back, accept that fate doesn’t mean for us to be together.
But how do I access powers within me that I don’t know anything about. They could be as lame as making something levitate for a moment, or as powerful as burning this whole place to the ground. I have no way of knowing what I’m capable of, and no one else seems to know either.
Although for whatever reason, the sound of lighting this place up does sound tempting. And it would surely draw Cian right back.
Maybe this is meant to happen. Maybe I’m being drawn to this idea of fire because it’s actually inside me.
Getting up, I walk around, concentrating on the thought of heat, of flaming red and anger. I’m angry at Cian for bringing me here, for not reacting fairly to my decision. I’m angry that Noah would have never done this, and that Cian is being the Sin of Greed that he is.
All of a sudden I see a flash of red in my vision, which for a moment I’m convinced is just in my head, until feel heat to accompany it. Behind me, a small flame has lit along the seams of Cian’s couch, which with one thought, begins to grow, until it completely encompasses it.
Standing there, I’m in a trance, unsure if I actually did that.
The fire doesn’t stop, and I don’t want it to. It continues tearing up, engulfing the wall behind it, and the rug before it, which is only inches from my feet.
Then the front door opens, and all the flames I just created vanish, the only evidence it ever happened being the dark remnants of the charred couch and burnt rug. Even the smoke seems to have completely vanished from the room, leaving only the slightest hint of the smell.
Cian meets my gaze. “What happened?”
My throat is dry, as if finally sinks in what I just did. “I think I found my powers.”