56
When she stood in his apartment and had coolly informed him that she was fine with their temporary affair, that above all she didn’t expect commitment, he should have been rejoicing. Wasn’t it a man’s ultimate fantasy? For a man like him, happy to take lovers for a short time until they bored him, or until they started looking for more.
Here he was, being offered this fantasy on a plate, and he well knew that she meant every word she’d said. It wasn’t some kind of devious reverse-psychology. So why had he felt anything but relieved? Why had he wanted to challenge her? Why had that instinct not to let her go felt so strong?
He’d certainly never aspired to the empty heights of marriage, either; he’d learnt at an early age that searching for that elusive happiness only bred disillusionment and pain.
Yet Sara McCall was making him question the very bedrock on which he’d built his life. His sluggish brain finally kicked into gear: attraction. That had to be it. A rare form of lust. He just hadn’t met a woman who’d taken possession of his body and mind before, that was all. That had to be all. OK, so she wasn’t into anything permanent-well, neither was he. He just wasn’t used to being on the receiving end of the ultimatum, that was all. He relaxed. Their affair certainly wasn’t over yet. Not by a long shot.
They still had time.
___________
Simon woke very early in the morning feeling thirsty. Sara lay curled up against him, her hair sprawled on the pillow and her breath tickled his jaw. He smiled at how peaceful she looked in her sleep and fought the urge to place a kiss on her forehead.
He didn’t want to wake her up, knowing how exhausted she had been the previous night, so he carefully got out of bed. He could make her some food before she woke up, and then they could have breakfast together before he left her apartment.
On his way to the kitchen he passed her living room, and noticed their clothes and Sara’s bag they’d thrown on the couch the previous night as they’d hurriedly taken each other’s clothes off. He grinned at the memory, making a mental note to grab them after getting the water.
Simon returned to the living room minutes later, and as he gathered their clothes, his eyes caught something. A file poking out of Sara’s open handbag. It looked too big to fit in completely, so she’d just shoved it in, leaving the zip open.
Simon hesitated, wondering what was in the file. It was none of business, he knew that, but for some reason he was curious. It was probably some stuff from work, he told himself as he pulled out the file and opened it. His eyes widened as he read the name at the top of the document. Seeing that she’d clearly filled a form from the hospital, Simon wondered if she was alright… Was she sick or something?
His surprise grew as he read the rest of the contents. Apparently, Sara was getting an IVF. It wasn’t the sort of thing he’d been expecting to see, and Simon had no idea what to think. Sara was trying to get pregnant? Through IVF? Was she pregnant already? What the hell was going on? Lost in thought, he didn’t hear her come in, until her voice brought him back to the present.
“What are you doing?” she asked him.
Simon looked up to see Sara, standing behind the couch, but she wasn’t staring at him. Her eyes were glued to the file that was still in his hands.
Simon stared at her. He didn’t know what to say at first, but then he straightened and closed the file. “I urmmmm… I woke up minutes ago and I didn’t want to wake you up,” he said casually, but his voice was hoarse for some reason.
“I meant…What are you doing with that?” Sara asked, as she finally lifted her gaze to meet his.
“Nothing,” Simon replied, “I was going to clear up the mess we made last night and then I found it,”
A frown creased her brow as she slowly shook her head. “Found it?” Sara repeated, “It wasn’t missing, Simon, it was in my bag. You mean you were snooping,”
He raised an eyebrow, not liking her tone, “Snooping is a strong word, don’t you think? Besides, I’m not the one who has been keeping secrets,”
Sara moved forward, and snatched the file out of his hand with more force than necessary. “Secrets? What I do with my life is none of your business, Simon,” she said angrily,” And you had no right to go through my stuff.”
Simon frowned darkly. “I know that it’s none of my business, Sara, but don’t you think this is something you should have mentioned to me?”
Sara gave a weary shake of her head. “I was already doing this before we met, and then I-”
Simon felt short of breath-as if someone had punched him hard in the chest. Damn it, he hadn’t been using contraception most of the time when the two of them made love, “So you were… are trying to get pregnant?” he asked softly.
“Yes,” she confirmed flatly. “I mean, No… But – Look, as our conversation has gone this far, I might as well be completely honest with you.”
“That would certainly be a novelty!”He looked at her coldly.
Her eyes flashed deeply golden. “I have never been dishonest with you!”
“Except by omission.”
“Perhaps,” she acknowledged heavily, her gaze no longer quite meeting his.Copyright Nôv/el/Dra/ma.Org.
“The truth is I decided months ago… Before we met… To have a child of my own by IVF.”
Simon’s thoughts were already reeling from one realisation to another, one question to another, and each one was becoming wilder than the last. Sara had once told him that she had lost her pregnancy with Bruce, but it turns out that she still wanted a child. In fact it now appeared she had coolly and calmly decided to do exactly that ‘some months ago’… His gaze sharpened.
“I see. And can it be that you were considering the blue-eyed blond-haired Mark Forbes as a possible candidate to be the donor for this IVF?”
The warmth of color entered the paleness of Sara’s cheeks. “I considered it, yes.”
“And did he agree?” Simon grated harshly, feeling a fury building up inside him the like of which he had never experienced before.