Beautiful in pain

“You should marry Hana.”

Adriel immediately tightened his fingers hard until they were red, he gritted his teeth to contain his anger that was ready to surge out.

“Are you kidding dad?”

“Marry Hana, or Daddy himself will throw you in jail for raping Hana twice.”

“Jeffran!” said Tamara who immediately barged into her husband’s private workspace, for the first time Tamara called her husband by name.

“Don’t be crazy! Do you want to imprison Adriel just for the sake of that damn child?! The child who suddenly came and claimed to be pregnant! Come on, you’ve been fooled by her, realize Jeffran!” Tamara said angrily, she did not accept if the eldest son married an unknown person, even one who had cheated on her family now.

“Enough Tamara! Do you want to raise a son who is a jerk like him! Look! You saw for yourself that he was touching Hana’s body just now, don’t pretend to be blind!” Jeffran said firmly making Tamara’s guts immediately shrink, if like this no one will be able to refuse orders from Jeffran, and now he turns her gaze to the eldest son.

“Take responsibility for your lewd deeds, or you’ll sleep in prison tonight. You know I never play with my words, and one more thing. Dad never taught you to ruin people’s lives, be a responsible man.”

Adriel was silent, he could not answer the words of his father. He shouldn’t be so drunk. He shouldn’t have accepted Rizal’s offer to accompany him for drinks, he was just annoyed that Vania postponed their proposal. He thought it was a good thing to let Vania make a one-sided decision, but in fact it drained her mind and emotions. And now? Maybe marrying Vania will only be his wishful thinking.

“Dad give you time to think until tomorrow afternoon, marriage or prison.” Jeffran’s final break up.

“What?” Adriel was silent, he was getting dizzy. Why did his father give him such a short time, this can’t be.

“Father… why do you have the heart to make Adriel marry that maid?” Tamara said softly hoping Jeffran would melt.

“That means Mommy is willing to see Adriel in prison.”

“You’re too cruel.”

Jeffran ignored his wife’s protests. He just looked at Adriel who was now thinking hard.

“I never taught you to be a coward. I know you are a responsible man. Never disappoint me again.”

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Jeffran’s words pierced Adriel’s heart, disappointing his parents was not one of his wishes.

Adriel was silent, he preferred to get out of his father’s workspace. He needs to think clearly, this decision concerns his future, he doesn’t want to be rash to marry Hana who he doesn’t even know at all.

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Adriel hit the steering wheel of his car hard, he drove his car at high speed to release the thoughts that were now raining in his head. No, he wasn’t thinking about the wedding, but he was thinking about Vania’s feelings. Her lover.

After wandering around the city aimlessly, Adriel decided to return home. But he emphasized the speed of his car when he saw a small church not far from his house, Adriel thought. He had rarely visited the house of God. In the end, he parked his car in the front yard of the church. With unsteady steps, he entered the church. The atmosphere was very quiet, maybe because it was already night. But this atmosphere made Adriel’s heart a little calm.

He sat down on the front bench, he looked down. He shouldn’t be here, he thought. He came dirty and still smelled of alcohol, but his feet brought him here.

Adriel Silence.

He took a deep breath to ask Him for help. Hopefully this prayer of his can be heard, at least to make Adriel convince himself to make the right decision.

“God, I am your sinful creature. Actually I am ashamed to face You, after a long time I came again to your house. But. If you can, can you give me this guide for myself? This time I really will leave everything to You.”

Adriel exhaled again, he leaned against the back of the bench he was sitting on. He didn’t want to hurry home, for some reason the cool and peaceful atmosphere he felt now made him want to linger. He is now struggling with his thoughts and feelings. Looking for a way out of the problems he is currently facing.

“Should I be honest?” asked Adriel of the vacuum he was occupying now.

He thought for a long time, he didn’t realize it was almost midnight now. Adriel’s better to go home, he is sure of his choice. He would rather be imprisoned than betray his lover. He had no idea.

Adriel tightened the jacket he was wearing ready to stand and stepped out of the church. But he undoes that intention when he hears the sound of crying behind him.

“Hana…” said a familiar voice. Aunt Laksmi, and she is not alone, she is with Hana now.

“God… Hiks. Isn’t it enough for you to give me this test? Isn’t it enough that my father doesn’t want me to be his daughter?” Hana said with a sob because she had been crying for a long time.

“I just want the father of my baby to admit what he did and apologize to my baby. He shouldn’t have done such a vile thing if he didn’t want his presence. I will sincerely accept his existence, I just want him to know his father is enough, I don’t want him to live as miserable as I do. But. I believe in all your plans. This time I really will leave everything to You. My job is just to be patient and strong.”

Adriel’s chest suddenly felt tight like it was being squeezed by a very large rock. The corner of his heart ached, he felt like he was slapped by the words that came out of Hana’s mouth, he looked back up at the church ceiling.

“Should I?”